ive been "sick" all day long. not like fever/puking sick, im total loss of energy and attention sick. you know, the kind where it almost hurts to breathe, you're tired but you cant sleep because of the tingly body syndrome.... and to top it off i had a buncha honey roasted peanuts which gave me a stomache ache.
i woke up too late today.....almost 11. hate that. my mom was off all last week, which was kind of nice because the house would be clean when i woke up. the house was not clean when i woke up this morning. ::sighs:: my dirty house made me want to just GET OUT! lol, i caught up with my mom and brookside medical clinic somewhere around noon, then i stopped over at bonnie's house. always fun getting to see her. i probably only stayed for 25 minutes or so though. her dad was being pecular. he brought out a garbage bag full of corn, and just dumped it out in the front lawn. it got both bonnie and i's attention. after he dumped it out, he just sort of casually walked back into the house or something. we late found out that the corn was damp and needed to be dried. fred also rode around on his moped for me.....it was great. he wanted me to give it a try, but i was not about to do that. hmmm, i picked up some pizzas from little caesers to bring to my dads. im so fucking sick of pizza, i hate the thought of it even. ew ew ew. wafaa paid me back for it. yup, i went to my dads for a few hours. it wasnt any fun because of my being ill.
i didnt weigh in at weight watchers....obvious reasons.
no dinner tonight.
i went to the mosque to pray....no good reason. no one was really there, just a few men, no women. i got home and had to deal with my moms bullshit. shes such a fucking loon. it makes me really mad that this is the kind of home i had to grow up in. my mom was sitting on the floor watching tv, and wanted the remote control. i was sitting on the couch behind her. we werent far apart, so i just decided to toss it to her. i was aiming for slightly to the left, but it hit her in the middle of her back. it wasnt hard at all, it was a toss. she just started bawling and saying "why are you so mean to me?". she thought it was some evil, malicious act. my mom and i hadnt fought at all today. we havent had any sort of small problem at all. shes just been glass lately. it really pisses me off. why do i have to live with bullshit? my mom switched from prozak to welbutrin not long ago. it makes me even more mad that david and dora each have 10+ years of it. i wish them well.
ive been watching the olympics on and off lately. man, i those identical Hamm twins are smoking. lol, ahh im in love. theyre the american male gymnast guys. and the swimmers. i think courtney use to talk about how she liked a swimmers body. they reall do have amazing bodys. and all of their muscles are in all the right places....theyre just perfect. i have to go. good night
love you
i tell you, ive been watching the olympics |
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hmmm
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Aug. 4th, 2004 @ 10:54 am
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oh i dunno
maybe i'll just run up to the store
or maybe i'll just go drive around the block
or maybe i'll get a taco
the options are never ending |
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Jul. 22nd, 2004 @ 11:01 pm
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ohhhh! has anyone seen the forecast? sunny, and in the 70s all weekend. im so excited. i love it when the weather is perfect. my mood is so controlled by the weather. im obsessive compulsive about it all the way. i watch the weather channel like 5 times a day, even if the weather is ok, and i watch all 3 local weather reports. smooth sailing for a while. my day today was terrible! i had one of these moody magda days. one of those days where i just couldnt muster up the energy to do ANYTHING. i wanted to eat all day long, and just sleep. i would have my brief suicidal moments, never long enough to actually walk to the kitchen to get the knife. i guess thats good. even if my life isnt always bad, or difficult, its definately different, which is its own struggle. i swear, sometimes i just sit back and just have a good laugh at my situation. lol, i really do live in unusual circumstances. its strange now, but hopefully it will be a really awesome thing in my future. matt damon is sooooooooo adorable! oh my god, never until like 2 minutes ago did i realize how really, really ridiculously good looking he was. the zoolander in me just came out. oh my god i want t have his children! ahhh!
my dad took me out tonight. we had dinner at fazolis, and we went to the mosque, and wal mart, and the mall for like 2 seconds. had an ok time. he bought me forest gump because it was on sale at walmart for like 5 96. i shouldnt shop there, i here its run by a buncha republicans. man, i wish i could vote. i have so much hatred in my body for our presidents. www.bant-shirts.com has awesomer antibush shirts. my favorite is "instant asshole, just add oil", and "eat bush, suck dick, but dont vote for em". john kerry hasn't exactly been an outstanding candidate though. anything is better than bush though.
i havent read my book in 3 days.
i need to get my camera developed
i need to buy a new printer
i need to buy a new digital camera
i love you
good night |
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i dont even WANT to watch the weather tonight. |
| » (No Subject) |
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"I will give up.
resigned."
SUCH DRAMA! lol, ::puts hand on for and faints onto bed::
well, ive scrapped the give up idea for now. i guess i can give oatmeal, bananas and spinache another try. ive created a menu for the entire week.
my room has become quite a mess, very depressing. i must clean it tommorow morning. i dont like female cats, and i dont like longhaired cats. if i were to choose a female, long haired cat to a dog, fish, bird or lizzard, i would choose the cat. however, if i had to choose between a long haired, female cat, and a short haired, male cat...id go with the short haired male cat. when i went to bonnies last friday i melted! she has these really big, sturdy, short haired cats. love it.
i saw anchorman tonight with my mom. it was so funny! oh my god i cracked up when they all broke out singing "afternoon delight." one of the best moments in cinema ever. lol, it was great fun. popcorn. with butter and salt. stomache ache. always. why do i continue to eat popcorn?
bush jokes are everywhere you turn.
Jul. 19th, 2004 @ 11:06 pm
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| » not to self |
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REMEMBER TO RENT OFFICE SPACE
Jul. 18th, 2004 @ 10:03 pm
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| » back from chicago |
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yeah, we went. my mother and i left for chicago at probably 9 or 930. we got off on Austin St. (YES!). lol, austin is where we got off for the billy corgan. i love that neighborhood. its just north of chicago, its very similar to rockford. very, very similar to rockford. middle class, diverse people. the difference is, if you're wanting to go into downtown chicago, its only like a 10 or 15 minute drive. we drove down to lake shore drive. it was breath taking. lake michigan is so beautiful.
Things i love about chicago:
1. the residents of chicago were all over the bike paths. everyone was out exercising, and roller blading, and riding bikes, and jogging. all different sorts of people were doing.
2. the lake itself is gorgeous
3. i like looking up at the tall buildings
4. great food. cute cafes
5. very clean
6. lots of flowers and fountains everywhere
7. the parks
Things i hate about Chicago
1. the tourists...like me.
lol, not really. on the "magnificent mile", everyone was WHITE and RICH. these woman all had botox, wearing heels, and walking their tiny little dogs around. it was annoying as hell.
2. everyone walking past the homeless giving them dirty looks and NOT helping out.
3. the traffic'
4. the overall "im better than you" vibe that 97% of the people gave off.
5. all of the rich bitch stores
i saw t-shirts for fucking 80 dollars...my mom bought one
she got really lucky at bloomingdales, big big big big discount on that shirt. she got one for me tooo, its alright.
6. EVERYONE WAS THIN, EVERYONE!
theres more to tell, but i dont want to.
Jul. 18th, 2004 @ 07:03 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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| Big Five Test Results | Extroversion (34%) moderately low which suggests you are quiet, unassertive, and aloof.
Friendliness (62%) moderately high which suggests you are good natured, trusting, and helpful but possibly too agreeable
Orderliness (26%) low which suggests you tend to be very unreliable, lazy, careless, and unmotivated.
Emotional Stability (20%) low which suggests you are very worrying, insecure, emotional, and nervous.
Openmindedness (62%) moderately high which suggests you are intellectual, curious, imaginative but possibly not very practical.
| Take Free Big Five Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com
Jul. 18th, 2004 @ 07:22 am
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| » stupid me |
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im LOVING my new book, wicked. i swear, i saw the book, with a green witch on the cover and thought, "wizard of oz! yay! i want it." after the fact of course. i find out that its like this huge musical right now and has one like a gazillion tonys. i had no idea. i guess that must be why is was right inside the door at borders. its hillarious. elphaba, the witch, is the daughter or a minister, and an adultress (is that word?), its strange, i love it. she was born with sharp teeth, likes to bite her wrists, and toes...lol, its so great! not much story has actually happened yet. im only on page 40. it will take forever to read. its a very thick book, thick like clinton....'s book. ha, i'm a dork, i found that very amusing. i started writing thick like clintons book, then it turned into a penis joke. i'll bet i didnt need to explain. my ears hurt from my headphones. theyre kind of tight.
i already have a grey ring around my finger from the cheapass (but cute) ring i bought today. my mom went to lane bryant to buy my sisters b-day gift. my sister wears a size 18 tall....rather hard to find. well actually, anything about 16 in a tall is hard to find. we bought her 2 shirts, jeans, a necklace, myself a ring, and a bra...$140,....but with like a million coupons, we brought it down to only 66. a deal.....considering the jeans alone were a whopping $40.00 without any coupons or discounts.
while we were at the mall buying my sister's gift, my sister called. she was drunk as a skunk. i couldnt make out what she was saying. sadly, we couldnt come over on her b-day with the kids. THEY CANT SEE HER LIKE THAT! poor monica though. b-days, and special occasions, or holidays are particularly hard on her. she did come over in the morning though. she smelled of liquor, but didnt seem totally drunk.
david and dora are going to the dells tommorow.....THROUGH TUESDAY! fuck yeah! my mom and i might go to chicago tommorow. it sounded like a good idea for a while, not anymore. i dont look forward to anything. not as myself. if i could disguise myself though....endless possibilities. maybe i could just throw on a pair of sunglasses, and a cheap blue wig. smoke a cigarette, heavy on the lipstick, and denim jacket. i need a major makeover. major! the hair is an easy, but risky change. id love to shave it all off, but id have a scarry, bumpy, red head. and who knows if i have a birth mark up there. i could dye the hair, but daddy probably wouldnt let it happen. OR, i could lose weight. oh fuck me again. a fucking month till school starts up again. a pound a day? haha. kill me now. im waiting, waiting, waiting. i need a new atmosphere. hate living with my mom. would never consider living with my dad. runaway? where? how? remotely possible? nope. i could do something fucked up, and get thrown into a mad house. then i may as well kill my mom, because she'd leave me. die? perhaps, but still way too much mystery as to what would really happen to me. move in with bonnie? move in with courtney? step into a time machine, punch in 2007 and have a place of my own? do drugs to make myself oblivious to everything? kill everyone around me? none of these are real options. im very stuck. i dont believe i can change myself much if i dont change my surroundings.
maybe its the idolatry on my walls. everything should be torn down and ripped up! should i kill the dog? ive heard that angels dont enter places with dogs....or marilyn manson paraphernalia for that matter. maybe i should pray. perhaps i should just give up altogether. not just give up changing in any way, but give up wanting to change, give up thinking changing is an option. give up any hope what-so-ever.
i will give up.
resigned.
Jul. 17th, 2004 @ 11:01 pm
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| » my day |
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today was sort of a boring, average day until around say.....4:00 i did the regular stuff, slept, watch movies, tv, ate, played around online, swam, etc. when i came inside from swimming, i turned my tv on to watch i love the 90s:1994, because i missed it the other night. it didnt work! my mom didnt pay the cable bill, so our cable was turned off. i about died. why did this have to happen on i love the 90s week!?!?!? my mom and i went to radio shack in the mall to get some rabbit ears, so she could watch the local channels. we passed by claires, and i saw they had a whole buncha houndstooth shit. jackpot! lol, i bought some houndstooth earings for 4.50, and like this matching buckle, bondage looking, houndstooth bracelet to go with the earings. they rock so hardcore. my dad picked me up tonight, as we had previously arranged, and to took me out. we went to borders so he could read the egyptian newspaper and drink coffee. i sort of looked around at books and stuff. i went for the death/dying books, astrology, and religion....things i dont know much about, but would like to. i was reading this like secret meaning of birthdays book, it was so dead on. everything it said about people born on march 9th was true. lol, and it also said some pretty scary shit. it said that around the age of 80, i will lose everyone. id become widowed, or seperated from everyone i love for a number of years. i'll be isolated. but if i make it through, i will sort of have a new found freedom and beginning, and should live a good life till i die. i wonder if theres any truth in that. we'll find out. i went and sat with my dad at the cafe there, and had a frozen mocha..aka HEAVEN. ahhh, it was so good, 10 times better than starbucks. in the new releases i found this book Wicked :The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West. ive always been in love with the wizard of oz, so i really wanted the book. daddy said no. he said if i didnt find any clothes or anything at the mall, that hed bring me back and get it. so we went to the mall, i hate the mall. we just sort of walked around and talked. there was like a big sale at express, my dad looked like a fool in there, but her bought a few shirts. i was very good, didnt buy anything. but while my dad was trying on his shirts, i went over to sam goody and jokingly said, "want to give me a cd or 2, im kinda broke." lol, he was like, "sure, i do, come here." i sort of laughed and walked away, thinking he was joking. but he said, "no, for real, come here." i went. lol, he gave my 3 cds. he said they get some free cds to give out every so often, but theyre not suppose to advertise it....they give em out to people who ask. i havent listened to em yet, they prolly suck. one cd has 25 songs, various artists, the other one is coheed and cambria or something....6 songs. i was very happy. on our way out, i decided to see if walden books had the book for less money...it was the same amount there, so my dad bought me the book. im thinking im too tired to read right now, but i'll read it tommorow afternoon. ive missed 3 years of the 90s though. bonnie said that they even mentioned the smashing pumpkins fuck, fuck fuck. i guess i'll be going to bonnie's tommorow night to watch the final 2 years.
no tv to lull me to sleep tonight. i think i'll stick almost famous in
good night
is my spelling really terrible? i think it is. oh well
Jul. 15th, 2004 @ 11:42 pm
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| » puuuuuuuuuuuuuke |
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i did end up going to lisa's tonight. my dad came over and ended up letting me reschedule our little father/daughter outing. very greatful. lisa had a 7:00 open, so we went then. she's teaching me coping skills. ive realized that most of my problems arent like super terrible like alot of other people. ive never been raped, or physically abused,or anything like that....but the way i handle situations is terrible. i dont think ive lived one day in the past 2 years without crying at least once. i know im a pussy. or, i get reeeeeeeeally uncontrollably angry. courtney may have seen this once or twice. i went through a strange period in my life, maybe when i was like 11, when i was really terrible with my mother. i still am, but not to the same extent.
i missed 1994, but i was home in time for 1995....oh the memories it wasnt as good as i was expecting though. oh well. they of course had the clueless, hootie and the blowfish...things like that. hootie and the blowfish was a really awesome band. i never had their cd, but i remember ALWAYS hearing them on the radio, in the car with my sister...before she was TOTALLY crazy. good times. even when i hear one of their songs, i get all frilly dilly. haa, i so made that up. i watched the first half of titanic last night, and the second half this morning. ohhhhhhhhhhhh! i cried so hard. i hadnt seen it in years, it was so much better this time. it was so romantic. im not found of leonardo dicaprio, but kate winslet rocks, and so did her prick husband (who was very hot). it was so unbelievable. lol. and i watched mary poppins with dora. its kind of a cute movie. i looved it when i was young...watched it a million times. and i watched 200 cigarettes because i like it. i dont know why i like it. but i do. i want to buy all the johnny depp movies ever made. all of them. i havent seen too many of em. i didnt even know he was in as many was he was until very recently. i'm pretty damn suer that he is THE ABSOLUTE SEXIEST MAN EVER TO LIVE. no matter how hard you try, theres no comparison.
i guess im done
i love you
good night
Jul. 14th, 2004 @ 10:33 pm
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| » ::sighs:: |
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im so sick of my fathers bullshit. every time he calls me he says "malik?"...it means "whats wrong" in english. he never stops! im fine, im usually fine. my dad is insecure as a father, so he aaaaaaaalways asks me, whats wrong? he tells me, he commands me to do STUPID things. and everything he says he does because he loves me, comes back to him. "magda, i want you to lose weight. it makes ME really sad that you're overweight". "magda, you need to be a better muslim, or Allah will blaim ME." Thats not even the point though i suppose. today is wednesday, Lisa day. i cant go to lisas today because my father wanted me to go exercising. i fought with him about it for a long time. i told him i wouldnt go. i cant tell him that i CANT go, because he doesnt know about lisa. why? because if i have problems, i should go to god. because no one knows better than god. my dad acts like hes some sort of fucking Ghandi. so, i told my mom to cancel at lisas..........which fucking sucks, because we were going to do this kinda cool thing today. well THEN, my dad calls and argues with me some more, but then decides i dont have to go. at first, i thought he was like being nice, but then he says "i'll still be there at 6:30". earlier, he was suppose to pick me up at 5:30. i told him i still wanted him to pick me up at 5 30.....oh, um, i have a meeting that i have to go to now. so in dadland, 6 30 really means 7 or 730. so now not only have i missed going to lisas, im going to miss all of my shows. why? so my dad can take me out for coffee or something gay, and say "whats wrong," "what can i do to help you lose weight" "when are you going to start going to the mosque more often?" "i love you, i love you, and it hurts me to see you liek this" "why dont you want to spend more time with me?" AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
i dont even know what im complaining about anymore
Jul. 14th, 2004 @ 05:20 pm
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| » ok ok ok |
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well, theres a tornado watch right now, but not a single cloud in the sky. should i be worried? im not really sure. im suppose to be making out a menu for my mother right now. we have hardly any food in the house, but im still suppose to make a menu with waht we have. my mom is lying to herself if she thinks this will work out without buying any groceries. i love the 90s last night was absolutely fabulous! i cracked up ssoo hard. hal sparks singing "nothing compares to you" was by far my favorite part. oh my lord, or when they were making fun of eddy vedder (sp?), from pearl jam. i cant wait to watch it tonight. i have a headache. i think i might do a little cleaning today. im in a really motivated mood today. well, i was, until the tornado watch, then i got bummed, but im going to get back motivated. i will give you an update tonight
i love you
Jul. 13th, 2004 @ 01:45 pm
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| » you're still the one |
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i love it!
You're still the one, and i love you so
still the one, and i cant get enough
we're still having fun
and you're still the one.
lol, its on an applebees commercial, and whenever i hear it, i get goosebumps.
i mean, i would really love, and look forward to being like 60 someday, celebrating my 40th anniversary with a wonderful man, and having him tell me that he's still having fun, and IM still the one. wouldnt that be a great feeling. i long for romance so badly.
i was thinking about this earlier, and i'll bet that throughout my life, sex will be JUST a perk. sure, sex is great, and id love, and want lots of it. but id much rather have a man that would just hold me, or lay in bed with me for hours, tell me im gorgeous, and like dance with me every night, whether its in our pajamas at home, or if its ballroom dancing. i cant wait. i want a man so badly. A MAN. ya know, one reason why i might not even be slightly INTERESTED in guys right now, is because i prefer older men. im not attracted to boys our age. lol, right now, im really digging guys in their mid to late 30s. is that gross? brad pitt, johnny depp, billy corgan, my cws teacher, and just other random older guys. i wouldnt ever get with anyone that much older than me, simply so he wont die on me.
im off to go swimming.
i called you earlier courtney
no answer, prolly at work
you should call me
i want you to come over to my house with bonnie on either thursday or friday. we've decided that its OFFICIALLY a gathering, not a party. you'd bring it to life.
ttyl
Jul. 12th, 2004 @ 07:03 pm
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| » almost done |
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i like this!
might be my favorite
sorry, courtney, i dont think you much care for courtney love, or hole. can yall read the curly font? im not sure if i'll keep it. im not quite done, but im tired of sitting at my computer. im going to go fix up the yard a l ittle, then go swimming
seeya later
Jul. 12th, 2004 @ 02:53 pm
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| » i hate this! |
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i hate the way my journal. i hate the black and the red....and i dont like the picture as much either. ive been having problems with pictures. there are a few stills i took from a dvd....and i tried to get those on here but its in the wrong format or something? i dunno. i dont know what to do.
Jul. 12th, 2004 @ 01:46 pm
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| » stolen from courtney |
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Name: Magda
Nicknames: Maggie (only courtney calls me this), Habibty (it's arabic, my father calls me this)
Age: 16
Location: Machesney Park
Hair color: dark brown
Eye color: Brown
Height: 5'11
Tattoos: not yet...
Piercings: ears
About you
Scars: being teased all my life, and a few healing scars on my arms
Freckles?: nope
Do you wear Makeup: only when i pretend to be a rock star, when i go to concerts, maybe some special occasions, or if im just in a strange mood.
What color is your bedroom: disgusting cotton candy pink, covered with SP, Garbage, and no doubt posters, also some other random posters
Most expensive item you own: well, its not like i work, so i dont really own anything. the most expensive thing i have though is my car
How would you classify your style: simple. during school i usually just wear blue jeans, and a solid colored, long sleeve shirt, or a band t with a jacket over it. ive tried being "stylish", didnt work.
Fear: anything unknown to me
Loves: billy corgan, my dead cat, music
Hate: President Bush, myself (only somtimes)
Worst Habit: eating
How do others see you: i dont know..courtney said her first impression of me was that i was stupid
What are you labeled: fat
How many contacts do you have: i have alot, but i only ever talk to like 5
How many are online right now: 6...only talk to 2
What song are you listening to: I'm listening to Us or Them- The Cure
Love
significant other: of course not
How long have you been together: ....
What attracts you most to them: well, in general im attracted to people that are quiet but not shy, insecure, simple, happy, cushiony (not fat)
What bothers you most about them: They're not real....for me at least
Your crush: i dont really have "crushes", unfortunately, im not ever interested in more than one person at a time, and i can latch onto the idea of that one person for years...
How long have you liked this person: 2 years
Do they know you like them: ?
Are you a Virgin: yes
Would you ever hook up with someone of the same sex: thats kind of an awkward question. i want to have sex only in marriage (crosses fingers), and i couldnt see myself marrying a female. however, i suppose id like to hook up with a chick
Home
Are your parents together: no
Pets: bowie, my new white kitten, chester, year old fat cat
Siblings: 2 older from my mother's first marriage, 3 younger from my fathers new wife, 2 adopted (theyre really my niece and nephew)
Siblings ages: 33, 31, 3, 4, 1, 9, 5
parents age: both 51
Parents job: moms a postmaster, no idea what my dad does
House color: very thin white paint
Number of floors your house has: 1
Fav. thing about your house: the pool
School :*(
School colors: orange and black
Fav. Class: i loved speech and debate
Least Fav. Class: same here...math
Fav. teacher: plona, livingston
Least Fav. Teacher: wiebe, neumeyer
Clubs: no
After school activities: from like jan-march, i do chorus in the musical
Are you popular: LOL HELL NO!
What do people think of you: Didn't you already ask this question?....
Ever cried at school: usually right after school lets out, i start crying....not because im necessarily sad about anything, but its just so stressful in general....its draining
Swore at a teacher: not really....i sort of recall saying "what the hell?" to mr. crow in 8th grade once. hell isnt that....and it was mr,. crow anyways
friends
more acquaintances than friends: yes
Best friends: bonnie, courtney
Do you like all your friends: usually, i dont like bonnie was she starts talking politics, and i dont like courtney when ive done something to upset her
Worst thing a friend has done to you: lied
Worst thing you've done to a friend: i think im pretty good to people, they might disagree
Loudest friend: ?
Shyest: i dont think i have a shy friend
Most talented: ?
Smartest: lol, courtney and bonnie are both geniuses..to me anyways
Sexiest: all my friends are sexy....i dont know
craziest: courtney
weirdest: none
Always makes you smile: none
Someone You wish you were better friends with: anyone
An acquaintance you wish was your friend: kristy
Secrets (or not)
done drugs: no
got drunk: nope
Smoke: nope
Stayed up all night partying: nope
Stayed up all night alone: yes
Had sex: no
Hooked up with someone you didn't know: nope
Hooked up with a friends guy/girl: no
Snuck out: nowhere to go in machesney
Stolen: nothing big
Skinny-dipped: no
Stalked someone: kind of
Favorites
Color: silver, purple
Music Genre: alt. rock
Movie Genre: dumb movies
Band: smashing pumpkins
Animal: CATS!
Sport: i will only play tennis
Song: very tough.....stand inside your love, sad machine, a night like this, plump....so many....
Quote: ?? theres one dealing with time, but its quite long
Book: i havent read enough books to have a favorite
Movie: as good as it gets, chicago
Composer: mr. corgan
Language: english, arabic if i want to talk with my dad in front of my mom
Person: AHHH! dunno
Clothing: t-shirts
Beliefs & Views
God: yes
Attend Church: i go to the mosque in the summer
Spiritual: i try sometimes
Aliens: umm, not out of the question, its hard to believe that we're the only people in this never ending universe
Ghosts: Yes
Love at first sight: perhaps
Wishes: Erm, what does this mean exactly?
Abortion: Pro-choice
Politics: Democrat
Death: scary as fuck
Sex before marriage: not for me
Legalizing marijuana: yeah...ive debated on this at school, and even though im anti-weed, i think it would be safer if it was regulated and legal.
Eating disorders: duh!
The media: i dont believe anything i see on the news
Gay marriages: yeah
War: terrible, immoral, unnecessary
Meat: hamburgers are satan
'Angry music': in the 8th grade
Word Association
Love: ?
Music: in my head
White: bread
Death: inevitable
Computer: shit
Peace: hope
T.V: off
School: hell
Sex: lacking
Plant: dont care
Hate: everywhere
End!
Jul. 11th, 2004 @ 10:29 pm
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| » rock and rollllll |
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i bought velvet revolver today...actually my mom bought it for me, she also bought me The Cure's new cd, and a hounds tooth purse. i cant give you a cd review on either cds yet. i just put velvet revolver in. as im typing this sentance, im still on song number 1! my first thoughts on the cd? hmmm, scott weiland doesnt sound the same. very good though. very good. surprisingly good. i usually dont have good luck with the very first songs on cds. any cds. its very straight forward, bullshit free rock. lol, i'm not sure what straight forward, bullshit free rock sounds like, but if i were to guess what it sounds like, it sounds like this. you know, if the rock star thing doesnt pan out for me (which it will), i would love to write cd reviews......for Rolling Stone. why do i dream up these impossible lives? the second song is good so far also. sexy, sexy, sexy fucking voice. have you seen the slither video. scott rips off mick jagger's dancing, either that, or its some sort of tribute?? well, what im getting at, scott KNOWS HOW TO MOVE. ohh fucking yeah. it drove me wild the first time i saw the video. im scared! i know i will be very tired, very soon. i have two whole new cds to listen to and critique. NOT ENOUGH TIME! ok, two songs down, on velvet revolver, and im switching to the cure. actually, i wont listen to anything while posting.
i went to the vet today....BOWIES A GIRL! ok, yeah, it was a little relieving (cat wont spray), but it bummed me out a little too. i havent had a girl cat since i was very young, and she was a bitch, i hated her. im keeping the name bowie
Jul. 10th, 2004 @ 11:25 pm
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| » my room |
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its really remarkable how much the quality of life improves when you keep a clean bedroom. how long has it been since i cleaned it? 2 weeks maybe? maybe only 1? im not sure but it feels great. i enjoy myself in here. im surrounded by beautiful people. billy corgan, james iha, darcy wretzky, jimmy chamberlin, melissa auf der maur, gwen stefani, tom dumont,tony kanal, adrian young....they all watch over me as i sleep. and ive im making a fool out of myself, singing in my room....im singing to them. i cant wait to change my room though. several, several posts ago, maybe even as far back as may or early june, i talked specifically about how i want my room. but as far as a quick change, id really just like to paint my walls a really nice, dark color. this cotton candy pink drives me crazy. im going to change my background today. i dont know if i want to go back to a smashing pumpkins, or if i should go with hole, or maybe even just a really wasted picture of courtney love. hmmmm
i guess we'll find out
Jul. 10th, 2004 @ 11:41 am
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losingmagda's journal